I’ve written a few articles for The Huffington Post on my experiences of being a stepmother. It’s been quite a learning curve in many unexpected ways. Sometimes it’s really rough and I want to book myself a trip to a remote island, and other times extremely rewarding. I haven’t written that much about it in my personal blog though for many reasons. One, it’s not like I’m writing about my dating experiences – this is about my family, which gets extremely personal and involves other people

I’m bringing this up because I got a note from a reader who was wondering what was going on in my life. She asked if I was still married to the guy with the kids, if I was happy, and whether I had any resentment about giving up the dream of a traditional family. So now, because I want to reach those who are thinking about marrying or dating or committing to someone with children, I’ve decided to share a couple of things. Many singles are frightened to do it

It also means grieving over the idea that you will never get any of those firsts, like the first house together, the first wedding for both of you, or the first child together. That is something real and difficult. But I also think that traditional families aren’t all that common anymore, and if we give up on a chance at happiness with someone we connect with just because he has children and a previous home, then aren’t we denying ourselves a life filled with family and love?

There are many pros and cons to being with a divorced dad, to being a stepmother. While I could spend many days focused on the cons, the pros are far more meaningful and make the struggles worth it. I love my husband. He is a good man. His children have accepted me into their lives, which is no small feat. So, how am I doing? It is many things both difficult and rewarding, and it changes day by day. But every day, I’m so glad to be here, in this moment, with my family.